I usually only cry in the woods. By myself, at least half a mile in and 45 minutes from home. Periodically I take day long retreats to spend time with God. There I find the aches, disappointments and hurts of life catch up with me. I cry a little and then God and I talk for a while. Life hurts.
(God and I laugh and talk about a bunch of other things too. Don’t flood me with worried comments. 🙂 )
I watched the movie “I Can Only Imagine” tonight.
Hearing the breath-taking lyrics of Bart Millard’s hit wash over me again took my breath away. Time and again over the two hour movie I felt nearly 20 years of my relationship with God. Out of the pain of his life Bart imagined standing before his Savior. Hearing the song I felt the emotion of how my Savior walked me through the last decades.
I can only imagine standing with Him away from the pains of this life. Finally leaving behind Diabetes, Leukemia, and my easily besetting sins. Finally just existing in the presence of the only love in my life greater than Ashley.
I love what Isaiah said about Heaven:
“He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces, and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth, for the Lord has spoken.”
Isaiah 25:8 ESV
I think Bart’s struck a chord in the soul of millions. We all ache for that moment of joy. That moment when we can drop the burdens of life like an overloaded backpack.
Will we stand stunned in silence or leap for joy?
I think I need to lose myself more in dreaming of that moment. Not dislocating my heart and body from the life….just connecting and hoping for the joy of that moment before my Savior.
Just like the thoughts of “hugs and kisses” from my daughters even now warms me to the challenges of living as a dad.
Just like the soothing memory of standing alone in a rippling creek reminds me to spend more time just enjoying life with God.
Just like the exhilaration of my last kiss from Ashley motivates me to the walk of faithful husband.
Watch the new movie “I Can Only Imagine.” It stands out for excellence all around. Soak in the beauty of that simple song. Lose yourself in the feeling of that future moment. Then live out who you need to be today.